Im breaking down and asking for help.  Now, if you know me, you know this is no easy task.  My to-list is ridiculous, and Im drowning in the piles surrounding my desk.  I need help…are you the one for me?

I’m looking for an intern, there’s no money to be made, but I have knowledge to share.  You can learn the ins-outs of a real working studio.  The fun parts, the not-so-fun parts, and hopefully leave with skills and a new friend.

I’m hoping to find someone available 2-3 days a week, working about 5-10 hours.  My schedule is always changing, so someone with a bit of flexibility is great, but I will be respectful of your schedule as well.  I do occasionally shoot on the weekends, but not typically all day.  Im looking for someone with some office experience, especially in the organizing department.  I need someone willing to carry bags, climb ladders, and hold light stands.   Do you have your own transportation to and from the studio?  Once you’re here, if we go anywhere, I’ll drive…

If this sounds like something you’re interested in, please fill out the form below and I’ll be in touch.  I’d love for you to start soon…before I completely lose my sanity.

Click here to find my online application.

And…what would a blog post be without a photo.  This is a shot from my visit last week to Vegas.  Just a quickie, nothing big….but I do love sun flare!

One of my favorite parts of working with  “le MOD FOX” ( her friends call her Amy Moore) is the element of surprise.   I never know what I’m going to get with her, and I guarantee every time, she completely out does herself.  This shoot for MOD FOX POP! (Just one one of the many amazing parts of her business) was no different.  This particular shoot I knew there would be balloons, and a Valentines theme…and in true MOD FOX form, she shows up and puts a big smile on my face…it’s one of those days I remember why I love to do this.

Go check her out…there’s something for everyone.  http://modfoxstyle.blogspot.com and in the meantime, watch this little ditty we put together just because…

Thanks Amy, for making my job easy. For the hours of collaboration we’ve already had, and for the many, many, MANY hours to come.

I found this blog post tonight.  I have felt for a long time all of these words of wisdom, but never had the words to write them myself.   It’s a road map for some, to keep us doing what we love to do without feeling like we need to compare ourselves to those around us….

A must read…and since I couldn’t have done or said this any better…in the words of Cheryl Jacobs Nicolai.

Click here to see the original post.

I get asked all the time, during workshops, in e-mails, in private messages, what words of wisdom I would give to a new and aspiring photographer. Here’s my answer.

- Style is a voice, not a prop or an action. If you can buy it, borrow it, download it, or steal it, it is not a style. Don’t look outward for your style; look inward.

- Know your stuff. Luck is a nice thing, but a terrifying thing to rely on. It’s like money; you only have it when you don’t need it.

- Never apologize for your own sense of beauty. Nobody can tell you what you should love. Do what you do brazenly and unapologetically. You cannot build your sense of aesthetics on a concensus.

- Say no. Say it often. It may be difficult, but you owe it to yourself and your clients. Turn down jobs that don’t fit you, say no to overbooking yourself. You are no good to anyone when you’re stressed and anxious.

- Learn to say “I’m a photographer” out loud with a straight face. If you can’t say it and believe it, you can’t expect anyone else to, either.

- You cannot specialize in everything.

- You don’t have to go into business just because people tell you you should! And you don’t have to be full time and making an executive income to be successful. If you decide you want to be in business, set your limits before you begin.

- Know your style before you hang out your shingle. If you don’t, your clients will dictate your style to you. That makes you nothing more than a picture taker. Changing your style later will force you to start all over again, and that’s tough.

- Accept critique, but don’t apply it blindly. Just because someone said it does not make it so. Critiques are opinions, nothing more. Consider the advice, consider the perspective of the advice giver, consider your style and what you want to convey in your work. Implement only what makes sense to implement. That doesn’t make you ungrateful, it makes you independent.

- Leave room for yourself to grow and evolve. It may seem like a good idea to call your business “Precious Chubby Tootsies”….but what happens when you decide you love to photograph seniors? Or boudoir?

- Remember that if your work looks like everyone else’s, there’s no reason for a client to book you instead of someone else. Unless you’re cheaper. And nobody wants to be known as “the cheaper photographer”.

- Gimmicks and merchandise will come and go, but honest photography is never outdated.

- It’s easier to focus on buying that next piece of equipment than it is to accept that you should be able to create great work with what you’ve got. Buying stuff is a convenient and expensive distraction. You need a decent camera, a decent lens, and a light meter. Until you can use those tools consistently and masterfully, don’t spend another dime. Spend money on equipment ONLY when you’ve outgrown your current equipment and you’re being limited by it. There are no magic bullets.

- Learn that people photography is about people, not about photography. Great portraits are a side effect of a strong human connection.

- Never forget why you started taking pictures in the first place. Excellent technique is a great tool, but a terrible end product. The best thing your technique can do is not call attention to itself. Never let your technique upstage your subject.

- Never compare your journey with someone else’s. It’s a marathon with no finish line. Someone else may start out faster than you, may seem to progress more quickly than you, but every runner has his own pace. Your journey is your journey, not a competition. You will never “arrive”. No one ever does.

- Embrace frustration. It pushes you to learn and grow, broadens your horizons, and lights a fire under you when your work has gone cold. Nothing is more dangerous to an artist than complacency.

I had the wonderful opportunity last week to meet up with one of my favorite local (somewhat) photographers, Annie Manning, from Paint the Moon Photography. I have been watching her business grow and change over the last year, and just happen to have gone to High School with her wonderful husband. I was lucky enough to get a bit of their time (since they just happened to be in town) and met up with them that afternoon at a coffee shop. Of course we talked shop…I felt like I was meeting a total celebrity. (Scott I haven’t seen each other in 15+/- years, and Annie…this was our first time meeting.) I’ve basically seen their children grow up online, and always enjoy Annies new additions to the photo galleries. With our busy lives and juggling kids, it was brief, and completely last minute. I hope you don’t mind Annie for my posting a few photos.

Taylor and Kaci had the camera today, and they documented our visit. I just love this little family! I love getting opportunities to catch up with people from my past. Even though Scott and I weren’t close, I don’t ever remember being in the same groups of friends, but I do remember he was always so nice. I’m sure the “guy” in him, doesn’t love being referred to as “the nice guy” but that’s how I’ll always remember him.

Thanks again both of you, for letting me take up some of your time, especially on a family vacation, and meet your sweet family. I am looking forward to seeing what new and exciting adventures cross your path. I wish you both the best of luck! And, besides my kids, you have two of the MOST beautiful girls I have ever seen…they are just as I pictured them.

If you don’t know about Annie and her fantastic vintage actions, you must check her out.  She has loads of useful tips and walks you through using all of her actions and textures.

This year I’m about fulfilling dreams.  No matter what they are, If I’ve wanted to do it…I’m ready.  When I was a middle schooler, my Dad went on a Police ride-along with a family friend.  Since then, for whatever reason I’ve wanted to do it.  For the excitement, the curiosity…I don’t really know.  I always said “One day, I’ll do it.”   Finally that day came.

Both girls were conveniently out of town at the same time…I know, never happens.  I thought I’d work, take the extra time to be down at the studio, maybe clean the house, enjoy the quiet.  After realizing that’s what I ALWAYS do when I get a free moment, I quickly picked up the phone, called an old friend of mine and made some more “exciting plans”

I’ve known Camille since our freshman year in High School, and without divulging the awful number of my “real” age I will tell you, that’s a LONG time!   She is now one of the wonderful “women in blue” right here in Bend, fighting crime and keeping our cities safe.  We’ve talked several times about scheduling a ride-along, but timing is never right.

Wed afternoon, (she works swing) I met her down at the police station, picked up my fancy “Civilian Observer” jacket and we set out on our adventure.  Unfortunately most of the details of the night I’m not at liberty to discuss.  Although I will say it was a fairly quiet night.  It gave me a new perspective on what these officers go through on a daily basis…and the dislike some of our townspeople feel for them.  I discovered they are really not that scary.

So, the list of to-do’s or my “bucket list” is quickly dwindling.  I can make a big old scratch across this one. Next time you see one of these “ladies in blue” or gentleman for that matter, smile…instead of the glares I noticed from several people.  Hey, thank them even.  They have a really hard job.

The past few weeks have been consumed with blogs, rebranding, templates, html, words I can barely pronounce and lots of hair pulling…literal hair pulling.   I don’t usually consider myself a violent person, but faced with the daunting task of configuring my own new wordpress blog and trying to re-brand myself, I had to reconsider that statement.  (I did however refrain from throwing the computer out the window, or reaching over and smacking the closest thing to me, which would have been my wonderful partner in crime Kimberly Teichrow, which I’m sure she did appreciate.)

I starting looking through old photos, “What did they all have in common?”  What is my “style?”  This should be an easy question to answer.  “Clean with a bit of vintage flare!”  However, trying to get that to translate was more difficult than I expected.  I am a firm believer in the “Onion Theory”  People have layers, they are complex and multifaceted.   I may be putting to much thought into the whole idea, and if the photos are good I doubt the clients will make their decisions based on my blog template.  I’ve just sort of been stuck…..

More than just trying to find the right blog template, and a great website revamp, I think my problem is more internal.   I’ve been battling the feelings of unease in my own life.  Life is constantly changing, with kids and work, and while the majority of my life I am ecstatic about, I can’t help but feel like there is a huge piece missing.

There are times when I think about the words to the Collin Hay song, “Waiting for my real life to begin” and I wander if this is it.  This isn’t a complaint.  It’s a mere statement, that this isn’t exactly what I thought it would be.  In most ways it’s better than I could have imagined.  I think what’s been plaguing my mind is the unease of it all.  Not knowing what’s around the corner.  Not knowing who I am….

What I have learned through all of it is this….

It’s alright.  I’m 35 years old, and if I had it all figured out, what’s left.  What would I have to look forward to.  It’s the tears, and laughter, the trials and celebrations that lead us on the path to find out the answer to the eternal question. “Who am I?”  And for now, does it really have to boil down to a blog, website or business branding?  I doubt this is ultimately going to change the way a client views me, and this seems to be only the surface reason for my inner turmoil.

So here’s my solution….

It’s alright.  We are all a work in progress, and I am going to let my brand be that as well.  I AM on onion, a multifaceted multi-layered being.  I’m 35 years old, and next year I’ll be something MORE than I am today.  So for now, I’m happy to be right where I am, knowing that I am constantly evolving, and so will the business.   So all of you out here, who are asking this same question;  find yourself, be the best “you” you are  capable of being.  Experience your life, the moments you’re given, the good, the bad and the ugly, with grace and love.  Save the eternal question for our last days, and let those around you answer it for us.  After all, they will be a better judge of the “real” people we have become.

It’s is always harder for us to see the good in ourselves; the strength, the courage, the love and the compassion.  And we will probably always wander if this is as good as we are going to get.  Even in asking this question, we can be sure that there is always something else waiting to burst out, another layer we need to uncover…I am an onion.

.